How To Reach Us




The Beer Phone




Pigeon Post




  By Telephone:

We are a small company, and the office is not always manned* - at such times please leave a message. And if you are polite we will get back to you.

*Or womanned / personned if you are short of things to worry about

Office: 01763 250749

Sales (Dave): 07879 698541

By e-Mail:

We are at present happy with our supplier of pills, and my cousin really is a former Government Minister from Mombassa. We could however always do with more cheesecake, so feel free to spam away if you can help with this*

*Apparently we don't need more cheesecake, but are short of salads.  Yeah, right.


Please send to 'contact' at this domain

By Post:

Director Of Letter Opening And Red Elastic Band Disposal
Buntingford Brewery Co Ltd
Greys Brewhouse
Therfield Road
Royston
Hertfordshire
SG8 9NW
By Carrier Pigeon:

We can now receive mail by Carrier Pigeon or, for heavier or bulky items, by Overnight Crow.

Please visit www.theycouldgripitbythehusk.co.uk for more details.
 

Complaints:

Please write to 'The Person Nearest The Bin', at the above address.  On receipt, we will drop everything, launch a full public enquiry, sack the nearest oik, re-write 4,000 volumes of procedure, introduce new laws, and proclaim it will never happen again.  Or, if we deem it a proper response, bugger off down the pub - a place where all problems, except self-importance & greed, can be resolved - and bemoan the general lack of Gene Hunt on the telly.

Charity Requests

Our 2011 chosen charity is 'Give A Job To Feckless Oafs', an organisation which finds work for the terminally useless.  Nearly all those helped now hold major posts in all key areas of running the country.  Some (albeit very rarely) are even elected.

Other than that, we look kindly on most local requests - we can't help or even respond to everyone, but we do what we can, so please don't be afraid to ask.
 

In The Case Of Requests For Things We Have To Pay For But Are Expected To Supply For Free To Absolutely Anyone (Such As Beer Mats, Pump Clips, Bottle Labels etc), Please Address All Communication To:

I'm Looking To Ponce Something To Sell On Ebay Dept
Fat Cat Bonuses plc
Laughing-All-The-Way-To-Leeds
Creek-sans-le-Paddle
Great Britain 2010 Ltd (Still In Administration)